


In which Crowley Panics and Finds Himself the Proud Father of Three Kids

by Crab_Lad



Series: Writers Month Good Omens [17]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, F/M, Genderfluid Crowley (Good Omens), Kid Fic, Living Together, M/M, Raising kids, Slow Burn, TV Canon, maybe some book canon but im really just basing this off the tv series, or the miniseries sorry, or well not so accidental, they raise all three of the kids
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-22
Packaged: 2020-09-23 12:28:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20340106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crab_Lad/pseuds/Crab_Lad
Summary: Well, the title says it all





	1. Chapter 1 part 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi this chapter really is a sneak peak at a longer fic i have planned but also!!! day 17: accidental baby aquisition. Expect i twisted it and Crowley Just Took The Kids
> 
> The third kid is not gonna be greasy johnson because the third baby wasn't named in the tv series and no,,, they wouldn't name their kid that.

The only reason he delivered the baby in the first place was so that Hell didn’t come after him. Yet, as he was leaving he knew that whatever Hell had planned for him- well it definitely wasn’t good. And if the goal was to cause the end of the world… being raised by an American ambassador would do that to a kid. He couldn’t leave the kid.

He walked back into the convent, determined to find the baby. 

When he walked out, he was carrying not one, not two, but three babies. The nuns had really done a horrible job, he wasn’t even sure which one was the anti-christ. But he wasn’t going to risk letting any of them grow up to destroy the world.

Miracling three baby car seats into his car, he strapped the sleeping babies in and left, as fast as he could. 

“Call Aziraphale,” he called out.

“Calling Aziraphale,” a monotone robot voice repeated, only to be followed by an error message. 

It might be better to just show up.

\--

“Hi,” Crowley stated when Aziraphale opened the door to his bookshop.

The angel stared at him.

“Crowley… why do you have three human children?” 

“Right well, it’s a long story basically one of these is the antichrist.”

Without another word, Aziraphale grabbed the third child from Crowley and led him inside. An hour later, the two sat in Aziraphale’s back room with a glass of wine half empty in front of them.

“You don’t know which one of them is the antichrist,” Aziraphale finally asked. It came off as more of a statement than an answer. 

“Correct.”

“You replaced them with kids from an orphanage so their parents didn’t panic, and decided to take all three of them?”

“Yep," he responded, the "p" popping. 

“And you want us to raise them?”

“Yeah, well, figured who better?”

The angel frowned in his usual disapproving way.

“If Hell finds out-”

“They won’t.”

“Right.”

Leaning forward, Crowley placed his glass on the table beside him. 

“Honestly, angel, I was thinking. A cottage wouldn’t be so bad would it?”

With a hum, Aziraphale agreed.

It would be a long eleven years ahead of them.


	2. Chapter 1 part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!! thank you for all the lovely comments on the first chapter i really loved all of them and will get around to responding to them all at some point. But i wanted to get this part done :)

“Crowley, I don’t think it would be wise to move to the cottage yet. And I don’t think it’s wise to move together yet! I support you in all of this, but-” Aziraphale cut himself off. 

Before Aziraphale could continue, one of the kids let out a cry. The angel reacted faster than Crowley, standing and hurrying over to the baby swaddled in a blue blanket. Shushing the child, Aziraphale held him close, smiling down at him. The baby soon calmed, falling to a peaceful sleep in Aziraphale’s arms. 

After a moment of staring at the child, something seemed to click. 

Aziraphale looked over, and with determination in his eyes he said, “Alright. We’ll raise them. But we’re going to do it here. Your flat isn’t good for three kids.”

Scoffing, Crowley rose out of his seat to stand beside him, “Like yours is!”

With a stern look to Crowley, Aziraphale waved his hand. The sound of wood creaking followed it.

“It’s full of everything we need to raise three kids. Do they have names yet?”

Crowley rolled his eyes, but stood over to look over the baby swaddled in red.

“Yeah, this is Adam. You’re holding Warlock and… the other one. He doesn’t have a name yet.”

A beat, then, “What about Oscar?”

“N-askfj nO!” Crowley stuttered out, reeling back and pointing a finger at Aziraphale. “We’re not naming our kid that.”

There was an unreasonably large smile on the angel’s face, but Crowley didn’t take a second to ponder it. His mind was stuck on the “our” in his sentence. 

Getting Aziraphale to agree to help him took less convincing than he thought, and he honestly was floored that he would be able to say that these were their kids. They were the childrens’ fathers. Maybe, just maybe, it could lead to something more. 

“Well, what did you have in mind,” Aziraphale asked, turning his attention back to the baby.

Crowley took a moment to respond, taking a moment to soak in the sight of a coatless Aziraphale holding their child (now at least) and looking content. 

“What about… Damien?” he finally asked, leaning over the bassinette. He had miracled it to fit all three babies.

With a smile, Aziraphale looked back up at him, “I like it.” 

Ducking his head to avoid Aziraphale’s gaze, Crowley grumbled and stuffed his hands into his pockets. He kicked at the ground.

“We will need supplies though.”

Aziraphale placed Warlock back into the bassennette, “Late night shopping trip, my dear?” 

With a snap, Warlock vanished from his place and appeared on one of those baby harnesses on Crowley’s chest. A stroller appeared as well, with both Damien and Adam in it. 

\---

Not ten minutes into shopping things had already turned sour. Warlock was crying again, Damien had somehow managed to half slip out of his seat, and Crowley was floundering. It didn’t help that they were in a supermarket at one in the morning.

“Crowley, please you need to- oh dear, Damien, Warlock-”

Crowley turned his attention to Warlock while Aziraphale fussed over the other two, making sure both were safely in their seat. For a moment, the demon stared at the sobbing child unsure what to do. Then, slowly he rose a hand up to pat his head lightly. Warlock stopped crying at that. Feeling a bit more confident, Crowley poked at his cheek, just as lightly, and extracted a giggle from the baby. A blossom of warmth expanded from somewhere inside his heart, and he knew he would already do anything for this child.

Taking a deep breath in, he turned around to face Aziraphale and the others. He puffed out his chest a little.

With an air of confidence, Crowley took control of the situation, “Aziraphale, I need you to get the diapers, formula, and blankets. I’m going to look for clothes and toys and food.”

Aziraphale nodded nervously, but rolled the kids in the direction of the baby isle. Meanwhile, Crowley grabbed a nearby cart and headed to the clothing section. For a full hour, he picked out three of everything, little shoes, shirts, onesies, pjs. He picked out little things with flowers and others with animals. He decided to pick with the color scheme, using cold colors for Warlock, warm colors for Adam and brown, grays, whites, and blacks for Damien. Once finished, he moved to the baby section to pick out a few toys. At one point, Warlock made a happy noise at a small stuffed bunny and grabbed out to touch it, so Crowley grabbed that as well. Then, he moved to the food section and grabbed what he thought they would need. He grabbed food for him to make for Aziraphale as well.

It was the most content Crowley could remember being. 

===

That night, well morning by the time they got back and everything settled, the two sat back in Aziraphale’s newly miracled living room. 

“If we’re going to be living together,” Crowley drawled, attempting to appear casual when the subject of the conversation made him want to beam and blush, “and raising three kids together. We’re going to be seen as husbands. As their fathers and sometimes mother in my case.”

“I’m well aware of that, my dear,” Aziraphale answered, smiling at Crowley in that soft way of his. 

Crowley busied himself with picking at the tartan blanket. He was quiet again, while looking everywhere but the angel.

There was a warm fireplace underneath a large flat screen tv (Crowley’s doing). A soft brown rug sat under the black coffee table and a tartan armchair remained off to the side. A light brown table was placed next to the armchair with a pile of books already on it. There was a grandfather clock in the corner of the room and several bookcases scattered around. Crowley had miracled some of his own plants into the room. The floor was hardwood, but it fit in with the aesthetic of the room. It was cozy, and definitely something Aziraphale would think of. 

“You’re fine with it?”

“Of course.”

Sighing, Crowley slumped against the arm of the brown couch. How he wished that it wasn’t something they would ‘have to deal with’. He longed for it to be true. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have any ideas for what you want to see in this fic? Send me an ask on tumblr @goodalexomes ! I'm going to have a loose plot but its really just going to follow the two raising kids. I will eventually get to the apoclaypse whenever i feel like finishing the fic, but that's going to be much later. I really want to take your requests and build a nice fic over them :))  
\--Alex

**Author's Note:**

> got ideas for the fic? Send me them on my tumblr @goodalexomens!


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